fbpx

Navratri Contemplation

Namaste

KaliMaa

welcome to day 2 of Navratri contemplation…

first 3 days of Navratri are all about Kali Ma, the goddess who shakes things up, who sticks her tongue out to lick up your false sense of security and cut off the head of your ego…. Boom yes that’s scarey! Because that means taking off your mask and revealing who you are without any pretence! even when i write this what surfaces for you?
She is the fiercest form, the dark face of the Goddess Durga and inviting you to bring your darkness to light. these first 3 days are inviting us to bring our dark sides into the light, embrace them not deny them or hide them to then move onto the next three days with the beautiful Lakshmi… Yet we are not there yet so let’s explore this…

Durga gives birth to Kali (read blog on this) for Her to clean up the battle where the demons are reproducing more and more and taking over the scene, the demons represents are darker sides, the parts of us that we maybe deny or hide for the fear of being seen. this is like your everyday living where maybe the situations in your life are throwing you curve balls, or you are speaking ot so nice words to yourself and having a battle with your inner demons of self-doubt, self-hatred, lack of self-esteem or confidence.
Kali however steps up and slays the demons, cutting their heads off and  this is what she is bringing to consciousness, she’s inviting you to not deny these aspects but  acknowledge them and bring them to light. for me this is symbolic of taking off the masks we hide behind. WE often hide behind our masks so that we are seen as a good girl, a nice sweet yogini, yet is this the truth? Kali  holds a sword and for me I teach this is the sword of truth that cuts through the doubts, the fears, the lies we speak to ourselves or others. so here’s your Navratri contemplation

do you fear what people think of you?

do you ever reveal your darker side? even to yourself?

Do you need others opinions of you to give you a boost? 

Kali becomes intoxicated with the feelings of slaying when she’s in battle and this is a major shakti key for us… do you get drunk of your feelings of self-doubt, and fear so much that it makes you wobble in life and you need to hide or worse cut yourself of from the truth, because of how others may think of you?

I remember when I first committed to my boyfriend, my now husband (a very important key here) we were arguing as we were balancing our roles in  the relationship and i reacted so strongly I threw my favourite cup with coffee in it on the floor – and immediately cried as the anger shocked me, we both looked at eachother and said who was she? ie ME!  what i was doing wass pushing him so much by showing him my dark side to see if he’d love me anyways! and he did… we are married and you can read a Kali story about that here as Kali as Sati its half way down…

so now you….when you look at Kali do you fear Her? is this mirroring the fear you may feel that has made you reject or hide your darker sides of your personality. My fear was my man was going to leave me if I showed him i get angry because something i learnt as a child….

As a child I was told “children are seen and not heard” consequently I was shy, quiet, never ever expressed my anger and was deemed this pretty little sweet girl. Then as I was bullied through school again i was seen because i was blossoming but I was still shy and mysterious and would hide. then I began chanting in my 20’s…. Boom I found my voice and with it came my truth, and yes I admit i expressed my anger consciously in the wrong ways lashing out,  intoxicated with my rage, my fears, my self doubts of who I am. part of  this due to my supression early on. I hadn’t learnt ways or being seen or heard

Sanmukhi MudraSo you, do you have masks? this picture is of Sanmukhi Mudra, i like to use in my classes, where we consciously and therapeutically begin to take of the mask we often hide behind. Taking of the mask with this mudra, or metaphorically in life is liberating, you  see you as you. instead of the limited form where people see you as they wish or as we wish them to see us as the good girl, the sweet yogini rather than the woman who is expressing her anger or hurt or dis-trust or disgust. We have all experienced anger expressed unconsciously yet have you explored the fear, the anger all the Kaliesque feelings and just sat with them? and let the masks peel off…it’s so liberating. you drop the charade, the game and can just be – you!

this is my invitation to you today? whenever a feeling arises that is say anger or fear ? sit with it? as my teacher Chameli says, let the feeling arise, breathe into it, kiss it from within to give it space and let it flow – try it…. what does it feel like? where is it in your body – feel it from within rather than deny it or push it down….

and then look into Kali Ma’s eyes  – can you see the immense ocean of love? i float in that love…. and I will tell you more bout that tomorrow

 

jai Ma!